Today I have a date

Maximum photos, minimum words

Last night she slept for 9 hours.

But yesterday she was fussy all day long. (Lets call it a wash.)

Future archaeologist? Lets hope he’s cooler than Ross.

He’s my little chef. His ability to follow instructions and then remember them days later is a fantastic and endearing quality.

He insists on wearing these sunglasses, particularly in the shower. Hope he wears them at the beach this summer.

Love.

He loves holding his sister, but always remarks about how heavy she is. How’s that for irony?

When we did the photo shoot at the Mall, he helped his brother warm up to the camera. Something he didn’t have trouble with.

He tried to insist on bicycling with his handlebars backwards. I insisted that he did not.

Photo Credits: All Husband.

Freezing time

Unfortunately it’s impossible to actually stop time. This is why I try to document as much of the baby stages as I possibly can. Photos, video, and obviously blogging- which has been great because it has been a reference for those times when I couldn’t remember how fast Jack learned to speak or how much Henry could do when he was 9 months old.
This is one of my favorite things to do:

Jack’s footprint is from when he was nearly 6 months old, because it didn’t occur to me the first time around to do it right away. Henry was 5 weeks, and Maggie was 4.

I hung them with a ribbon that came with a baby gift they each received on a nail and I used a tacky wall putty behind each plaque because these actually are irreplaceable as their little feet will never be that size again.

Cloth Diaper Math

A box of diapers for Maggie at the store costs 29.95 plus tax. 136 diapers come in the box. Maggie has about 10 changes per day.
Each diaper costs 22 cents.

A box of diapers for Henry also costs 34.95 plus tax. 120 diapers in the box. Henry gets changed 6 times per day.
Each diaper costs 29 cents.

I should explain that we use cloth and disposables in this house. I find that at night disposables are unbeatable for wicking wetness away from the skin and keeping babies asleep. I also use disposables for naps, but only sometimes. My final reason for disposables is if I have a breakdown and can’t handle the added laundry (2-3 loads per week) and folding instead of throwing up my hands and running for the hills, I slap a bad-for-the-planet diaper on those little bums, keep calm, and carry on.

Most of the diapers are an investment from Jack that I’m still using. But they retail between $10 and $20 each. I have about 30 cloth diapers all together. And they resale at about 60% their original price.

In any given day I use 1-2 disposables on Henry and 4 disposables on Maggie. So I’m only spending $1.17-$1.46 on diapers daily- and that’s for two kids! As Maggie grows, and more importantly her butt grows (because many of her diapers don’t fit yet), she will be in more cloth and less disposables each day.

I wish I could do all cloth all the time, but I also wish to be sane, so I choose to be comfortable with that math.

I almost died

First from fear, then death-by-cuteness.

I went downstairs to start a load of emergency blow-out poop laundry (glamorous) when Maggie started to fuss. Suddenly she stopped. If there is one thing I’ve learned, silence is not golden, silence is trouble.

If the boys are playing in the basement and I hear crashes and screams and shouts I know all is well. If I hear nothing they are likely playing sandcastles in the cat litter or trying to open the fireplace. Silence is BAD in my world.

I digress… so suddenly Maggie stops crying. I drop everything and run up stairs taking the steps two at a time. At the top I find this:

Henry was sitting there saying “Shhhh shhhh shhhh.” Just like we do. Then he said “Okay Maggie, okay.” So sweet.

Sometimes the cuteness around here is deadly.

Photos of my adorable children

These are my favorites. We went to the mall, so it’s certainly not fine art photography or photo journalism. But the kids are mine, and they are freeking adorable!! Check them out:

I’m loving the cuteness. I’m ashamed to admit that there was an obscene amount of bribery involved in getting these pictures. Not Jack, he’s a big old Hammy-Ham. But Henry, ohmyfreekinggod that was a challenge! Maggie? She was just happy to get a change to show off her head control, can you believe that girl? Freeking strong like Amazon!

My expectations are always kind of low with these pictures-in-the-mall places. But I’m here to tell you, be not afraid my friends.  It’s not always easy or financially plausible to schedule fine-art shots.  I’ve been spoiled with a photo-inclined husband (click his picture on my sidebar to link to his geeky photo blog) and an artsy-fartsy cousin-in-law who takes wicked awesome pictures at Thanksgiving for our Christmas card every year. I always wonder if the photographers the mall places really like photography, or were just looking for a job.  But my low expectations lead to one super bonus: I’m often pleasantly surprised. Pleasantly surprised might be an understatement, right now I’m somewhere between “wicked psyched” and “victory dance”.

So, thank you, Mall Portrait Studio, you made my day.  A special thank you to the Carousel of bribery for making Henry’s smile possible.  (Yes, our mall has a carousel, and yes, I told Henry if he would smile for a picture I would let him ride the carousel.)

Childhood Memories

The secret is out. I post-date my entries. Usually I write them in the evening, setting them up to “go live” in the morning.

Having kids makes me wonder about lots of things. (Including references which will be lost on them, like “Be kind, rewind” and dialing a phone, even that Dell guy who turned out unsurprisingly to be an actual pothead. Dude, you’re getting a Dell.

But what I’ve been wondering about is what will their lasting memories be?

I remember swimming, and all the friends I made and the overwhelming support I had from my parents. I remember drawing elaborate roads on our driveway to bicycle on and raking paths in the backyard in the fall to ‘hike’. I remember playing with Nerf guns in the house when we lost power in the summertime after a big thunderstorm. My favorite memory is this:

My brother had this old school metal trundle bed and we used to pull out the old mattress to play with it. Sometimes we used it in elaborate fort building but the best was when we used it as a sled. We has this solid wood staircase growing up it was about 6 feet wide, but as a kid it felt like it was 10 feet. We would place the mattress at the top of the stairs and then lie on it on our stomachs holding the back end (so our feet would go down the stairs first). Scoot. Scoot. Scoot. Slide! It was over in an instant. At the bottom of the stairs was a wall. It had the air return for the HVAC in it. We would hit it so fast it sounded like the house was coming down.

I don’t remember ever getting yelled at for it… or told not to for that matter. How is that possible? Aside from the obvious “you could have broken your leg” there were photos hanging on that wall, we’re they not worried we would knock them off? Did the noise not annoy my parents to the point of insanity?

Am I just way more uptight than my parents were, or am I remembering what it was like as an adolescent and teen, when they realized I was not going to turn out to be a sociopath or a destroyer of nice things they owned?

The early years are tough. When you’re trying to feed them and dress them and teach them to be people, not apes who throw feces. It’s unfortunate that as it gets easier to treat your children like people they become less and less interested in snuggling up on the couch with you. Will they remember the snuggles, or will they remember that I screamed DO NOT THROW FOOD 7 times today?

Pretty soon they will be brining their high school girlfriends/boyfriends over to watch Armageddon again. Oh god! I will now go breathe deeply with my head between my knees.

Even though the Armagetting it on is coming for now my parenting is about throwing food. I take it all back, I’ll keep them small, potty training, throwing food and all!!

A day in the life

First, you must realize- the fact that I am writing this down means tomorrow everything will change.

7:00am Wake up with the baby, come downstairs to find the boys and Daddy getting ready for breakfast, relieve Daddy so he can get going to work.

7:30am Change and feed baby.

8:30am Realize I’ve been awake for over an hour and haven eaten or drank anything. Frantically choke down a high-fiber breakfast bar and 750mL of water at first opportunity.

9:00am Remind big boys to play nicely together, so mommy doesn’t get angry.

9:01am Explain that acts of violence towards siblings will result in loss of privileges.

9:04am Run down into basement playroom to resolve conflict which has now escalated to random acts of violence. Baby dangling in sling or on boob while I attempt to separate big kids for a time-out.

9:05am Count down to nap-time begins. T-minus 3 hours and counting.

9:45am Put in contacts and put on deodorant. Hair brushing is optional, luckily, hair is curly.

10:00am Brush children’s teeth. Am thankful one child does not yet have teeth- timesaver!

10:15am Change and feed baby.

10:30am Start preparing lunch.

11:00am Feed boys lunch.

11:30am Remind boys to eat while at the table. Please finish lunch, please stop hitting/ throwing food/ yelling.

11:45am Begin to attempt to change Henry’s diaper before nap

12:00pm Diaper change success! Now comes the emotional bribery to get him to go upstairs willingly. I cannot lift him without serious pain, am pretty sure I pulled a muscle in my abs.

12:30pm Toddler nap success!

12:01pm Change and feed baby.

1:00pm Infant nap success!!

1:04pm Must clean mess in living room in order to enjoy nap-time.

1:17pm Am starving. Eat lunch, chips, cookies and chug sweet tea.

1:35pm Must hurry and enjoy nap-time. Choose trashy show from DVR.

1:36pm Jack needs a cookie.

1:42pm Jack needs some fruit.

1:57pm Jack informs me he has to pee.

2:03pm I catch Jack trying to watch my completely inappropriate TV show when he should be gaming on PBS.org.

2:45pm Nap-time over for Henry. Enjoy Henry snuggles and story time.

3:00pm Ask Jack to turn off the computer.

3:20pm Jack turns off computer.

3:30pm Change and feed baby.

4:00pm The afternoon crankies set in. Whining, fighting and general bad behavior increase by 50%.

4:20pm Am finally able to get boys dressed to play outside. Shoes are cruel parental torture and take forever Jack- because he claims he cannot do it himself but I choose to engage this battle of wills because I refuse to put shoes on 3 kids and I can see the writing on that wall. Henry- because his penultimate favorite word is ‘no’, as first place belongs to ‘why’.

4:30pm Enjoy socialization with other adult humans while dealing with interruptions for street safety.

5:45pm Watch Husband’s car pull into parking space.

5:50pm Am cursing husband’s name. How effing long do you need to put down briefcase and change clothes.

5:55pm Will never speak to husband again. Where the eff is he?!

6:00pm Am so glad to see husband and have help. Finding him oddly sexy when he saves me from myself in this way.

6:30pm Dinnertime. Am also feeding baby.

7:15pm Shower or bath time. Am still feeding baby.

8:00pm Story and bed time. Am still feeding baby, cluster feeding is exhausting.

8:01pm Mommy does the dance of joy. Celebrating survival of the day.

8:02pm Play my turns in Words with Friends and Draw Something, watch DVRed show or movie.

9:45pm Pass out in bed.

Somewhere in the midst of all of this I try to do the following:
Stay in touch with family and friends. (I give myself credit for blogging.)
Laundry. Right now I’m averaging a load every other day, there is more to do but I do not have the time or energy on the off-days.
Dishes. We prefer to eat on clean dishes.
Diapers. Washing and reassembling Henry’s diapers takes about 2.5 hours. Luckily, 2 hours of that is wash-time.
Shower. I’m averaging 1 shower every other day. Fortunately, I have dry curly hair so showering every other day is ideal for my hair health.
Vitamins. I try to remember these daily. Especially because I would swear those placenta pills are keeping my energy up and my sanity on the level.
Crafty projects. I try to make time daily, even if it’s just 10 minutes for something I enjoy. It’s good for my sanity.
Cuddle each kid as many times a day as they are willing and time allows. In a flash they are going to be 12, 14, and 16. And I will be desperately seeking cuddles of any kind.

Real men wear babies

Breastfeeding as Meditation

In the day of tablets and smart phones, older siblings and other responsibilities breastfeeding often becomes a quick and dirty process for me. Even with Jack I always was sure to have a book (one of those things that came before the tablet) and the TV remote, just incase I got stuck on the couch for an hour.

How silly I was.

I always sit in a half lotus (which looks a lot like cris-cross applesauce) to feed the baby. I’m often in bed or on the floor in the playroom or on the couch. I sit with my legs this way because it allows me to sit with my spine aligned- not hunched over or arched. If I choose, or at this point, have the luxury not to have something I need to multitask I can meditate while I breastfeed.

Now, I am no expert at meditating. But clearing my mind and being present by observing my breath are things I can do.

When I sit, I sit comfortably, finding a position that works for me. I use whatever support pillows I need to comfortably hold the baby. This usually includes a boppy, a pillow from the bed or couch, and a blanket. I don’t let myself feel guilty for the laundry, dishes or cleaning I’m not doing. I don’t let my mind make lists of the things I have to do next. I breathe deeply; in through the nose and out through the mouth. I hold her with both arms. Sometimes I close my eyes- but I’m more likely to study the curves of her ear, the color of her hair, and the shape of her nose.

This doesn’t happen every time, sometimes I’m trying to dress a toddler or child one-handed while nursing the baby. Sometimes I get lost on Etsy or Facebook or Pinterest. Sometimes I watch TV or read a book. But sometimes? Sometimes I breathe deeply and take it all in. Sometimes I let myself enjoy the moment.